Friday, May 25, 2012

The Least You Shoud Know (5/25)

Tax records show that President Obama’s household income dropped about a million dollars last year. All that golfing is paying off; he’s becoming more like Tiger Woods.

Thursday, May 24, 2012

The Least You Should Know (5/24)

Twitter exploded with death threats after George Zimmerman was released on bail. He’s the most hated person in Florida and nobody knows where he is, which makes it hard for Casey Anthony to send him flowers.

Wednesday, May 23, 2012

The Least You Should Know (5/23)

An Olive Garden in Indiana accidentally served a rum cocktail to a 10 year old boy. His parents knew something was wrong when he drank about half of it and started calling his ex-girlfriends.

Tuesday, May 22, 2012

The Least You Should Know (5/22)

Mel Gibson was recorded in another rant. It’s getting old; from now on the Motion Picture Association is requiring his movies to have a warning for viewers who are allergic to nuts.

Sunday, May 20, 2012

The Least You Should Know (5/21)

Stores are doing away with self-checkout lanes. People are always complaining; younger customers don’t understand why the lines are so slow and older customers don’t understand where on the kiosk they check their email.

Friday, May 18, 2012

The Least You Should Know (5/18)

Snoop Dogg and Dr. Dre may take the hologram of Tupac they used at the Coachella Music Festival on their tour. In case of a confrontation with East Coast rappers, Tupac will travel with an entourage of surge protectors.

Thursday, May 17, 2012

The Least You Should Know (5/17)

The GOP voted down President Obama’s “Buffett Rule” that would tax the wealthy at a higher rate. Not all Americans understand what the vote was about; half the country thinks striking down the Buffett Rule means you don’t have to get a clean plate with each trip to get more wings.

Wednesday, May 16, 2012

The Least You Should Know (5/16)

New York police arrested a man who tried to rob a bank with a toilet plunger. There was nothing unusual; he walked in and started yelling obscenities, like everybody does when they’re using a plunger.

Tuesday, May 15, 2012

The Least You Should Know (5/15)

Next season the NFL will require unruly fans that are kicked out of a stadium to complete a behavior class. The league is tired of people getting drunk and taking off their clothes; it’s a football game, not the Secret Service.

Monday, May 14, 2012

The Least You Should Know (5/14)

In Louisiana, an alligator bit a guest at a Super 8 motel. It’s a reminder of how dangerous it is to take the last donut from the continental breakfast bar.

Friday, May 11, 2012

The Least You Should Know (5/11)

A New Jersey man has invented what he calls the world's most annoying alarm clock. It requires a series of steps to make it go quiet; it’s like a Joe Biden speech.

Thursday, May 10, 2012

The Least You Should Know (5/10)

The Obama campaign is reportedly directing their election year message to working women. That’s different than the John Edwards presidential run, when he apparently showed his support for working girls.

Wednesday, May 09, 2012

The Least You Should Know (5/9)

A study says that dogs at work reduce stress and create greater job satisfaction. Unless you’re a mailman.

Tuesday, May 08, 2012

The Least You Should Know (5/8)

A shortage in vanilla is expected to drive up the price. This summer the most valuable asset in the world will be an ice cream truck with a full tank of gas.

Monday, May 07, 2012

The Least You Should Know (5/7)

A pair of Marilyn Monroe’s underwear sold at auction for $45,000. It’s a bold move to buy the underwear of a person credited with something called The Seven Year Itch.

Friday, May 04, 2012

The Least You Should Know (5/4)

Wells Fargo opened a new bank that serves people with $50 million in assets. A lot of thought went into it; they installed bleachers outside to accommodate the Occupy Wall-Street protesters.

Wednesday, May 02, 2012

The Least You Should Know (5/2)

U.S. forces captured Taliban members who were hiding in women’s clothes. Some terrorists get caught in a cave; these guys got caught in a Dress Barn.

Tuesday, May 01, 2012

The Least You Should Know (5/1)

Spike Lee apologized to an elderly couple for mistakenly tweeting their address as being that of the guy that shot Trayvon Martin. The movie director has made a lot of enemies; there’s nothing more embarrassing for an angry mob than having to stop at a convenience store to get directions.